A story.

"She has finished cooking deliciously smelling cake in her summerhouse. Coffee is ready. But she is sitting and having difficulties with breathing. Her hands are somehow shaking - there is no news. It is raining again, and when she was choosing the rhubarbs in the garden she had a crazy thought to call Her. To tell that she does not want to compete and cause problems and she is sorry. That She should forgive Him and never blame Him. She is loosing faith, maybe she should give up, step out and take what it takes - all the suffering that she deserves. She has no roots with Him and even she feels strong and connected, do they have anything in common? Except that they are soul mates. But she is scared - probably not going to make this call. She is still hoping, even when all the facts are against. All these differences ... she could not go to the holidays in South Africa. She has done what she could, and expects now time to tell. He did crazy things - this is the first time she thinks one has done crazy things because of her. And she would do anything, even He is acting like an arrogant bastard - He is perfect. Only she does not compromise - no backups. Unfortunately she does not have grandpa any more, to ask for a wise advice. Should the fire be first and then learning to know the person? It seems this is the way to drive. If you start searching and choosing, looking for common habits and hoping that there will be connection - it will not work. Because you can´t make things happen - they happen on their own. She can only wait, no more stupid steps. She tried shopping till dropping. She searched for Custo and thought buying a dress from internet shop, which, ie the shop, was designed as lounge with the view to Sacred Family, will help. She can’t resist wearing Lise Charmel every day. Crazy. Absolutely stupid, she feels ashamed because she can still be so stupid - at her age and experience. But sometimes pain can be sweeter than sweet nothing. There are not many strawberries this year."